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I am a big advocate of technology and I believe that children should be encouraged to be technology-enabled if they are not going to be left behind in the race for information and social interaction.

Many school children these days have a bigger knowledge of computer-based activities than their parents.  Some parents just let the kids get on with it and others are so paranoid of the potential dangers that they refuse to allow their children to use the internet at all.  Both outlooks are cause for concern.

I have just returned from a seminar at my child’s school.  The accompanying paperwork says that the aim is to “give parents the confidence to be able to enjoy the internet safely”.  This is a commendable aim and exactly what is required.   The trouble is… I have come home somewhat disappointed.

Parents are at risk of being scare-mongered into keeping their children off the internet altogether.  The attendees were bombarded with dozens of statistics about the number of paedophiles and the number of searches for porn and the number of children with internet access.   Many parents attended the session because they were not very computer savvy and already had fears and concerns for their children who were racing ahead on the technology track.

Facebook was repeatedly targeted.  Cyber bullying is a major cause for concern and this was discussed at length.  I agree wholeheartedly that bullying needs to be addressed but banning your child from Facebook is not the answer.  By the end of the session some attending parents were getting very worked up and declaring that it’s plain and simple… “Facebook is pure evil and I wont allow it in my house”.

Of course Facebook is not at all evil.  The evil comes from those who misuse it.  Kids can be so cruel to each other.  Facebook, texting, forums and chat just supply additional mediums for them to express their cruelty.  We need to get the problem the right way up.   We need to address it from the perspective of the cruelty and teach responsibility with social interaction.  It’s too easy to blame the tools.

Another parent said that in her day things were so much easier.  She said that all they had was bullying in the playground and at least they could go home and close the bedroom door and get away from it but these days it’s all around… on the computer and on the phone and you cant get away from it.   I’m proud that my ten year old daughter sees it differently.  She says she would rather be bullied online than at school.  “Because” she says “online you can block them and de-friend them or report them.”  She understands the tools at her disposal and knows how to use them.

I drove home desparate to redress the balance so here’s my rant about the positives of Facebook!   Let’s take bullying in the playground.  If that’s happenning to my children then I have little or no visibility of it.  With Facebook, if I am in my child’s friend list, then I actually get to see who my child is interacting with.  I get to see who their friends are.   I get to see who the nice ones are and which ones we’d rather not invite round for tea!

Children should use the internet.  They should understand how to use Google, how to research and how to use to social and networking tools that are available to them.  Our fear of the internet must not cause us parents to deny our children access to it. 

One comment from a teacher who had been on a child safety course summed it up nicely:  We all know that we can’t live without water but water can kill us if we were to drown in it.  We must not deny our children water; we must teach them to swim.

Recommended reading:
The Child Exploitation & Online Protection Centre
The CEOP’s Think You Know website